Are you a "Budget Wife"?

A poster on the popular Chinese micro-blogging site Sina Weibo posted a description of the ideal wife, which has garnered much debate.  A "Budget Wife" has the following characteristics, among others not listed:

• Cannot be flirtatious or sexually adventurous
• Is a little horny
• Knows how to cook and wash clothes
• Speaks appropriately
• Is mild and warm in personality
• Is educated and reasonable
• Does not worship money

The idea of a "Budget Wife" emanated from the publication of the book "Me and My Budget Husband" a few years ago.  A Budget Husband is one who appeals to the Chinese female white-collar worker and is:

• Normal
• Not ugly, but not too handsome
• Neither poor, nor rich
• Employed in a field with low risk of layoff and unemployment
• Free of bad habits such as smoking, drinking and gambling

In short, a Budget Husband is one who is reliable and dependable.  Connecting with one increases the chances of a stable relationship.  This concept was borne out of the 2008 global financial crisis, when many high flying financially successful males lost their shirt.  A Budget Husband trails the performance of a Diamond Husband who is intelligent, educated, rich etc., but who also frequents bars and is unfaithful.

So there you have it.  Chinese descriptions of Budget Husband and Budget Wife are enough to set one who is seeking a long term relationship with maximum chance of success.  Get busy lookin' like one if you don't, and seek out those who look like the new you.

Sources:

The Budget Spouse Phenomenon, China Today, 2009

China's Lonely Seeking a Spouse -at Discount Rates, The Atlantic, 2013

Food crumbs under the table + Ants

Tonight after dinner, as I was cleaning food crumbs under our dining room table for the billionth time, I said in a semi-frustrated tone, "At some points little ants will discover unlimited supply of food under our table that'll make 'em REALLY happy."  Elin immediately responded, "Yeah, and maybe they'll give us a hug, and a kiss too"!

Suicide Mission to Mars?!

Is this real or a joke?  No matter, I will be keeping track of Mars One’s mission to send humans on a one way mission to Mars within 10 years in September 2022   .  Mars One is a company cofounded by 35 year old Dutch Bas Landsdorp.  Their introductory video on YouTube shows the participation of 1999 Nobel Prize winner theoretical physicist, Dr. Gerard T. Hooft, so these guys aren’t f*cking around.  And they have signed letters of intent from major aerospace companies around the world to supply Mars One with material and equipment for this mission.  The funding will be entirely from the private sector, and Mars One will turn this into a Big Brother type reality show unlike anything we’ve seen.

40 people will be selected through a global lottery to train in a mock colony in a desert somewhere soon.  The final team will be whittled down to 10 individuals.  The reality show will begin with the selection and training process, and be a major source of funding for this endeavor.

And just what obstacles does Mars One have to overcome to make this trip a reality?  By the way, I just realized this mission does not have to culminate in a success for Mars One to be successful.  The trip to Mars will take seven months.  Even half of that would provide adequate footage for a lucrative reality show.  Imagine the sponsors who would line up for a chance to hawk their products during each episode watched by billions?  So if heaven forbid, the Mars One space team blows up mid flight, Mars One’s business idea does not.

Anyway, Todd Halvorson published a September 2^nd, 2012 article in USA Today, titled “Landing People on Mars:  5 obstacles”, and those obstacles are:

Muscle and bone loss from being immersed in zero gravity, cancer from radiation exposure, and a whole host of other bio breakdowns, e.g. impaired vision.  But that’s if it takes the 2-3 years Mr. Halvorson assumes using today’s technology.  Mr. Halvorson is thoughtful enough to suggest remedies to all of these potential problems, except sex.  The National Academy of Sciences has reviewed NASA’s Bioastronautics Roadmap, and discovered “human sexuality was given no consideration”.  Fear not with Mars One’s version of the mission.  Reality shows thrive on that one aspect of human biological tendency, and Mars One producers will make this a priority to facilitate, with multiple cameras in a smoosh room for this purpose, a al Jersey Shore.  In fact, I’m willing to bet without a smoosh room this trip will be a no go.

We hope much success to Dutch entrepreneur Mr. Landsdorp and his Mars One company.  Heck, I’d seriously consider employment at Mars One given the right opportunity.

Stop pumping kids full of arithmetics – there’s a better way, a review of "How Children Succeed", by Paul Tough

This is not just a book about changing public policy to give impoverished kids the best chance to succeed.  All parents can put the theories of enhancing success factors to work for their children by focusing on character traits such as conscientiousness, grit, delayed gratification, persistence etc.  These non-cognitive skills – and Mr. Tough characterizes them as skills because they are malleable and prone to influence through early intervention – are just as much predictors of success as cognitive skills.  The conventional view of pumping with and measuring child development on the basis cognitive skills, e.g. IQ is outdated.  How well your child can persist when faced with mundane and often unrewarding tasks is more important.  The ability to delay gratification is important, and in that regard, Mr. Tough cites a famous Marshmallow experiment conducted years ago, whereby kids who were able to hold off eating a marshmallow for the promise of eating two became more successful than the ones who forgo the reward.

This very important and entertaining book is about solving the mystery of predicting “who succeeds and who fails”, and there are strong indicators that conventional wisdom may not hold.  Mr. Tough draws on numerous unconventional U.S. educational programs such as KIPP focusing on non-cognitive skills of  children from high stress and adversity familial background, and what methods they have employed to close the gap with children from affluent background.  There are intriguing studies from diverse topics such as chess and nurturing lab rats to explore the neuroscientific and psychological basis of the arguments presented as well.  HIGHLY RECOMMENDED.

Link to a September 7th, 2012 WSJ article on this book:  Opting out of the rug rat race

I hope your sore arm gets better in 100 days

The account of events that transpired on one night in early to mid 2012 has been printed without permission from my wife, Helena.  This story begged to be told, and I couldn't keep it from the world any longer.  If the blog below is erased for any reason, it should be painfully obvious who wears the pants in this relationship....

Tonight (some time in early to mid 2012), while Helena was putting Elin and Johanna to sleep, the effort turned into a bit of a comedy show.

Background:  Johanna plays with Helena’s right hand fingers, especially her thumb, every night comforting herself to sleep.  On most nights, she fidgets with both hands.  Elin prefers no touch, but lots of conversation.  Johanna sleeps on the left side of Helena, and Elin on the right.

The fiasco:  This particular night, Elin demanded Helena’s right hand.  So the two of them went berserk fighting over Helena’s right hand – lots of screaming and crying.  Then suddenly, in pitch black Helena felt a bite on her forearm.  Helena then asked Elin to move away for fear of getting bit again.  Elin said “I’m sorry.  I thought that was Johanna’s arm.”

A while later, Johanna agreed to give up Helena’s left arm, so Elin now had possession of that arm which has been sore for the past few days.  After lying in that awkward position with arms crossed, Helena told Elin her arm was hurting and she needed to move it.  Elin replied, “okay, I can let go.  I hope it’ll get better soon, maybe in 100 days.”  Helena replied, “I hope it doesn’t take that long.”  Elin responded, “Okay, maybe 50 days then.”

Common sense is the best guide - A review of "The myth of the first three years"

I am a parent of a 2 and 4 year old, and at no time was I exposed to the myth of the first 3 years, nor of the belief that the first 3 years of a child’s life have life-long intelligence and school achievement implications.

In "The Myth of the First Three Years", author John T. Bruer, Ph.D., dissects numerous studies from neuroscience and cognitive psychology to debunk myths and their perpetrators who improperly use science to bolster the claim that early intervention programs are essential to healthy brain development.  The authors of many of these studies are at odds with the conclusions of science writers and policy makers, he asserts.  While child policy advocates to not espouse these unfounded ideas out of ulterior motives, and their intentions are no doubt altruistic, funds and resources are wasted and misappropriated as a result, e.g. the government Head Start program.

The best parenting advice is one that has been in existence for over 60 years, which is first, do no harm, and second, talk, sing and play with your children.  Then allow nature take its course.  Children are resilient, and brains remain plastic throughout life.

Mr. Bruer is to be commended for his exhaustive research in separating fact from fiction.

2012 Highest Paying U.S. Jobs

If you're looking for a career change to increase your pay, or you're past that stage and have given up on career enhancement and are looking to steer your child to a high paying career instead, you may want to read the list of highest paying jobs published today on the CNBC web site.

The list has some surprises that buck public perception.  For example, CEOs are ranked 3rd in job category with an average annual salary of $176,550.  There are currently 267,370 of them employed.  When I looked a little closer at the rankings on the Bureau of Labor Statistics web site which served as the source for the CNBC article, CEOs actually ranked as the 11th occupation as measured by "annual mean wage".  The following 10 occupations ranked higher - listed from highest paying down:

Anesthesiologists, Surgeons, Obstetricians and Gynecologists, Oral and Maxillofacial Surgeons (Maxillofacial means jaws and face), Orthodontists,  Internist (General), Physicians and Surgeons (all other), Family and General Practitioners.

Not surprisingly, 9 of the top 11 professions are MDs.  There may be a potential flaw in the ranking, as it's based on wages only.  CEOs, for example, are compensated quite shamelessly and handsomely through non-salary means such as stock options, grants etc.  Total compensation package may have bumped CEOs up a few notches.

If you want your child to be a lawyer, the statistics have a breakdown of which subcategory of lawyers are the highest paid - Securities and Commodity Exchanges (avg. annual pay of $174,370).  It even shows which regions pay the highest wages for lawyers on average - District of Columbia (avg. annual pay of $161,050).

|Air Traffic Controllers have a mean wage of $114,460, ranked as the 27th occupation and one notch above Pharmacists, but if you're older than 30, you will not be allowed to start a career as one.