Auto thefts at the carwash

It was a partly cloudy morning with rain forecasted later in the day.  My carwash routine, which occurs once a month on average, involves dropping my car at the carwash and picking it up after I've finished my workout.  This is a convenient process as I don't have to wait for my car while it's being washed, and I take advantage of the 20% gym discount they offer; $9.99 for the basic wash after discount.

It was a predictably slow day at the carwash because of the rain forecast, and when I returned to pick up my car, no one was within range.  It would be a mind bogglingly simple task for an auto thief to waltz to my car in plain view, take the keys that were placed on the front driver's side tire and gingerly drive away (see picture below).

This begs the question why car thiefs use sophisticated methods to break into cars when they can prowl just about any carwash in the U.S. and have the keys virtually handed to them.

Not all car owners (like me) stick around while their car is being worked on.  At any given moment, even in light traffic, there are multiple cars parked waiting to be picked up.  One could even walk up to an employee, hand a bogus slip along with a couple of dollars of tip and drive away with someone else's car.  It's as easy as 1-2-3, or maybe I'm missing something here?  I scoured Google for car thefts at carwashes, and I found lots of articles on burglarizing carwashes, but no auto thefts similar to what I've described here.  I believe I'm onto something groundbreaking.

Here's a YouTube video of an ingenius car theft at a "Do it yourself" carwash.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cmARSgUWslY



My car at the carwash, exactly how I found it after my workout - My keys are on the tire



Addicts saying no to free heroin?

A free heroin pilot program in Copenhagen seems to have achieved limited success in allowing heroin addicted participants to improve the quality of their lives by reducing prostitution and crime rates.  Pure heroin is administered to patients twice daily free of charge by a doctor.  The clinic also provides free breakfast and a hot meal, along with counseling and help with tasks such as applying for disability pension and finding a child they have lost contact with.

http://politiken.dk/newsinenglish/article985984.ece

The only problem is, of the estimated 30,000 heroin addicts in the city, only 80 have taken up the government's offer.  Social workers believe the program is too controlled.  Give the heroin addicts freedom by allowing them to shoot up at home!  Who wants to get high in a clinic?  You can't hold down a job, study or have hobbies with that hectic schedule twice a day, seven days a week - according to the User Association, a group representing drug addicts.

"Butt-Dialing" Leads to SWAT Intervention

According to the Urban Dictionary, “butt dialing” is defined as “accidentally dialing a cell phone thats in your pocket and the resulting broadcasting of a conversation to the last person dialed”

According to Wikipedia, a “Butthead” is "an idiot who is stupid or inept."

A butthead must have typed the definition of "butt dialing" on the Urban Dictionary web site, as it's rife with punctuation and grammatical errors (see bolded words above).

On January 12, 2011, CBS News.com reported an unidentified man butt dialed his wife while listening to a rap song with aggressive lyrics.  Believing her husband was taken hostage, the wife called the police, and a SWAT team was summarily dispatched to the school in Winnetka, Illinois, where the husband worked.  "In addition to the SWAT team, the all-out response included at least three TV helicopters and dozens of concerned neighbors outside the school, where students had already been dismissed for the day, the Tribune reports."

"Armed with automatic weapons and wearing bulletproof vests, SWAT team members circled the school about 5 p.m. Monday, searching for a reported gunman who might be holding a hostage, the Tribune reports. The all-clear sounded nearly three hours later, after the man was found safe at home by police."
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In a January 11, 2011 article, The Toronto Star reported "An “unscientific” study found police were receiving an average of 300 “pocket dials” (also known as “butt dials”) every day. That’s 10 per cent of the total volume of calls to 911, says Broomfield. She launched the study after finding the volume of emergency calls was up 120,000 in 2010 over 2009."

Stop the butt dialing please!  It's costing taxpayers....

Mossad Vulture Free to Fly Away (cleared of espionage charges)

A vulture fitted with a GPS tracker by Tel Aviv university as part of a research project was captured by the Saudis and accused by the local media of participating in a "zionist plot" concocted by Mossad, the Israeli intelligence agency.  The vulture was subsequently cleared of espionage charges and released.  For a more detailed account of what transpired, click here.

What wasn't picked up by the media was the covert entry into Saudi soil of the vulture's two accomplices depicted in the undated file photos below - The actual perpetrators' physical features may have been surgically modified since these pictures were taken.  Mossad went to great lengths to disguise these creatures to give them as long a cover as possible in the Saudi Royal Family's palace to gather intel.  The whereabouts of these two is unknown at this time.  They are presumed to be captured in a Saudi jail in what some have described as slightly uncomfortable accommodations, awaiting interrogation.  The two are known only by their aliases:  Baruch (left) and Glukel (right).

A different measure of red and blue states - A Solution to the Obesity Epidemic in America - Bring Tobacco Back?

According to "F as in Fat: How Obesity Threatens America's Future 2010", a report from the Trust for America's Health (TFAH) and the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation (RWJF), “In 1991, no state had an obesity rate above 20 percent.”  In 2010, more than two-thirds of states had adult obesity rates above 25 percent (see red and blue state map below):

Ten of the 11 states with the highest rates of diabetes are in the South, as are the 10 states with the highest rates of hypertension.

The number of states where adult obesity rates exceed 30 percent doubled in the past year, from four to eight --Alabama, Arkansas, Kentucky, Louisiana, Mississippi, Oklahoma, Tennessee and West Virginia.

Northeastern and Western states had the lowest adult obesity rates; Colorado remained the lowest at 19.1 percent.

In a January, 2010, Forbes Magazine article “Big Fat America”, Michael Maiello states “Obesity is now a bigger health problem in America than tobacco use partly because people don’t smoke as much as they used to”.  The anti-smoking activists stomped out smoking by means of legal and social pressure, but curbing unhealthy eating is a bigger challenge.  The ill effects of second hand smoke was the catalyst in enacting aggressive anti-smoking laws.  This dynamic is not as direct with overeating.  If you stuff yourself, people in close proximity will not absorb some of your calories, so eating is largely a self indulgent and personal choice activity.

Even my older daughter’s stuffed animal with a hideous noise every time you press its left palm is guilty of overeating (judge for yourself):

So with the new year upon us, here’s my solution to America’s obesity problem: